Kale At A Buffet

It was a seemingly normal Friday afternoon for Lewis. He was out and about on his daily walk. What he does on these walks usually changes depending on his mood or how much he is holding. However, today was different. Lewis was jovially bouncing to the beat of a song playing.

Lewis: Yooo this new Yeezy song is the shit! It’s going to be stuck in my head all day.

Narrator: Please for the love of god focus!

Lewis: I wish that I could man, but when the beat hits you…. You just gotta dance!

Lewis begins dancing in the middle of the sidewalk. Bumping into people but paying them no mind at all. He looks like Toby Maguire in that once scene from Spider-Man 3, but Lewis doesn’t care. Aloof and lost in his own world.

Narrator: Ahem.

Lewis pauses in the middle of flossing and pulls out his AirPods.

Lewis: Don’t kill my vibe bro.

Narrator: Aren’t you the least bit concerned for how the people here are looking at you?

Lewis: Fuck Em.

He goes to put the earbuds back in but is interrupted.

Narrator: Yes I’m aware you don’t care what people think of you, but don’t you think you should focus on your match at PWE this week at some point?

Lewis: I don’t have a match.

Narrator: That’s not what the email from Charlie says.

Pulling out his phone Lewis opens up GMail. All the color from his skin fades away. The vibe was most definitely harshed.

Lewis: You’ve got to be kidding me?!?!?

Lewis punches the screen of the phone a few times and growls.

Narrator: They most certainly are serious.

Lewis: As if I don’t have enough going on with that massive twat Dane Preston, but now I’ve got to fight against a guy who was as good as gone a week ago.

Narrator: I don’t see how that is relevant.

Lewis: How is it not?!? The guy was literally ready to walk out the door because of…… reasons, and now he’s back with something to prove.

Narrator: Prove what? He’s a better wrestler than you are?

Lewis: Don’t be funny. Everyone is a better wrestler than I am, that’s just a fact. No he’s back to prove he isn’t what the world thinks he is. And that’s a loser on the grandest of scales. Someone who isn’t ready to come to the realization that he isn’t as great as he believes himself to be. That maybe just maybe, there are people out there who are just as good as they are in this. I know that I’m not the best thing walking, but he’s out to show that he’s at least better than I am, right?

Narrator: I suppose so.

Lewis: Of course that’s what he’s thinking. How could he possibly be one upped by me? What kind of threat could I possibly pose towards him? I’m just the funny guy that gets eyes on products. It’s why I was one of the first featured stars here in PWE. It’s why when up and coming lists are put out I’m always near the top of those lists. It’s why his own family Hired me for their company. It’s why TIA chose me out of the entire roster, one that he is part of mind you, to be the face of PWE.

Narrator: These are unfortunately facts.

Unbeknownst to Lewis he has been walking in and out of traffic. Narrowly getting hit a few times but he’s lost in his own world.

Lewis: Why unfortunately? You know what it doesn’t matter. The fact is, when people think of PWE, the first name that comes to mind is Black…. It just isn’t Vincent. Think of how that must feel for a man like that. One they wants to be feared. One that needs to have their ego stroked like they were a fluffer on a porno shoot. For the love of his life to be thrust to the top of everyone’s mentions. The person people rally behind. While she’s THE PERSON in PWE, Vincent is just A person in PWE.

Narrator: Well….

He stops and holds up a finger to no one in particular.

Lewis: Shut it, I’m on a roll. And you want to know what people like Vincent really hate? When the second name is mentioned.

Narrator: Holly?

Lewis: No.

Narrator: Damian?

Lewis: Come on be serious. 

Narrator: Allen?…. It’s got to be Allen.

Lewis: God your fuckin dumb. It’s Me you idiot!

At this point Lewis is making a full spectacle in the middle of a parking lot of a gas station they have apparently walked towards. Some people have their camera phones out recording the whole ordeal but once again Lewis isn’t paying attention to anyone or anything.

Lewis: Think about it. How would you feel if you were overlooked like kale at an all you can eat buffet?

Narrator: Well….

Lewis: Exactly. Vhodka is the prime rib and I’m like Mac-n-cheese. Both of us are top tier buffet food and are gone quickly, while everyone overlooks the Jello with the veggies for some reason inside. That’s him. That’s how he must feel. It’s sad really. I think that is all the motivation he needs for this match. A sad man. I know this isn’t going to end well for me and that’s okay.

Narrator: How is that okay? How could it possibly be okay?

Lewis: Remember my plan with Damian?

Narrator: Yeah, it didn’t work out for you in the end if I recall.

Lewis: Didn’t it tho? Didn’t I prove that I’m a threat no matter the situation? That I can’t be taken lightly? Or how it doesn’t matter how much you fight or wrestle, a thinking man is a winning man. 

Narrator: Kind of.

Lewis: Fuck you man. Either way. Vincent will get his mojo back. You’re welcome Vhodka. And I’ll be able to focus on bigger fish.

Narrator: Ohhhh.

Lewis: Now you’re getting it.

Lewis pops his AirPods back in and walks out of the parking lot. He looks around for a moment, then up at the sky and down both sides of the road before deciding on a direction and heading that particular way.

Lewis: Come on, we’ve got some phone calls to make.

Fade To black.